Giving Value – Please yourself first! Really?

Hi Life Artists,

The success of any project is directly related to how much value it gives to others – right? How much they like who you are and what you do. The belief is that our success depends on whether what we do pleases others. Although giving value to others is very relevant, often this focus leads us away from our own enjoyment and the experience we personally are having and muddles our ability to take actions now towards our creativity.

Let me ask you – how many of you stress out about trying to please others? How does it feel in your daily experience? And, importantly, how does it affect your ability to enjoy and take action in the now?

From the standpoint of a body – we cannot experience nor act in the future.

When my focus is directed toward pleasing others in some future – my ability to implement in the now becomes worrisome, stressy, and very uncertain. Instead of experiencing the joy of discovery, pleasure, and the fun of creative action within my momentary actions – I get doubtful, insecure, and loose connection with the now and the experience of just me playing and exploring. Instead, I start trippin’ in my head – will they like it, and doubt sets in.

For most of us – these mind movies aren’t exactly supportive. Most of our repetitive self-talk is fearful, and based on past hurts and shame – projected forward as the perception of a future experience.

Perception without the grounding NOW of our physicality – is a projection of our hopes, beliefs, conclusions, and judgments from the past – onto your present situation.

But is this real? Instead of the rich sensual – in touch and adaptable capacity of perception that our body naturally has – we trip out on possibilities. The thing is – possibility is the beauty of the mind – endless beauty or scary could be’s. Without the body – we miss the moment – and it is in the now where we are actually creating!

If we shift our focus at first, away from the obsessive effort to please and give value to others – and focus instead on what value you are receiving from contributing your gift to the world – how would your experience and creative ability be affected?

If you weren’t trippin’ on pleasing “them” – what would YOU enjoy and allow yourself to create? What if you allowed yourself the pleasure, excitement, and enjoyment you personally experience in what you are creating to come first?

Think about it – when you are full of excitement and pleasure – those around you gain enormous value! You touch their lives with joy, pleasure, enjoyment, and excitement. What is more contagious than this? The beauty is – people become attracted to you not by what you DO only – but far more by WHO YOU ARE!

If your intention is to give value to others – which I truly believe is part of why we create –  let’s try focusing first on the practical acts that allow you to do your work! What interests you – how you feel physically and on the experience of creating and exploring the possibilities.

Gifting the world and pleasing others is a fantastic idea – but what gets us there in reality? Obsessing about doing things right so others will like us – or genuinely loving our experience, our being, in each moment? When you are full of joy and relaxed pleasure – it expresses confidence and this act is such a gift for those around us.

Ultimately, we meet our aim – others share and get hooked on our excitement. And let’s get real – when you are stoked, and happy – creating is easy!


1.Shift your focus away from pleasing others. Focus first on what YOU value. On what YOU are receiving from contributing your gift to the world.

2. Find the why of your creativity: what do YOU enjoy and what do YOU wish to experience?

3. You give tremendous value to others when YOU are full of excitement, ease, and pleasure.

And remember –
You are the Creator – when you embody your creativity – you manifest your dreams!



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Creative D.R.I.V.E. in ACTION

Weekly implementation to deepen your practice! Simply do yourself a favor and while working with these questions – STAY PHYSICAL!

  • Take a sheet of paper: When wanting to create – before thinking of others simply ask yourself – if it wasn’t for someone else – what would I allow myself to explore and play with?
  • As you write, begin to embody this. How do you move, breath, feel?
  • Give particular attention to the area of your chest, heart, lungs, throat and relax these areas.


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