Releasing shame in the creative process
You wanna know what I think the number ONE killer of our creativity is?
I would argue – EVERY hindrance to our enjoyment, peace, self-confidence, and creativity stem from our re-actions (repeated actions) based on shame.
But what is actually shame? Brene Brown – renowned speaker and expert on shame and resilience defines shame as:
If you notice she says that shame is the feeling and EXPERIENCE of being flawed….I am a very practical person and here at Life Artists, I like to get practical about the meaning of things – get into the experience of these things – so you can gain skills to change your experience and most importantly create the experience you desire! So, let’s break this down;
The physiology of shame: Shame starts as a belief – which translates into a feeling/emotion – (energy in motion) – which translates into a physical expression and creates your experience. The experience of shyness, of self-doubt, the experience of feeling frozen when just a minute before you were full of ideas. The experience of believing your own self-image and not being able to see other possibilities – all are manifest as a physical expression.
The cultural practice and education of shame: I believe shame is taught, practiced, and cultivated through our consistent and socially acceptable – even socially required – practice of lying. You know what I mean; if I am great – I should tone it down, if I am sad – I should hide it, if I am confused – I should fake it till I make it – If I am scared – I should pretend to be brave, god forbid if I am angry, or envious. All of it stems around hiding the true state of our experience – and pretending another more acceptable way of expressing.
All this pretense expresses itself in our energy levels, in our physical tension, and movements – and all of this effort in “hiding” who we are and how we truly feel – gives us the constant experience of being wrong. If we were really ok – we wouldn’t need to hide. If who we are and the experience we are having can be expressed truthfully – we wouldn’t need to pretend to be something more, or less, or better. We would simply be enough. How is it, that the basic trust and connection to our desires and wishes, has been covered over so completely by shame?
Shame is educated into us – within our basic social education as children – yet continuing into adulthood. Social demands hinging upon our social acceptance – ask us to hide and suppress our wants in order to fit in, be liked, accepted, and ultimately connected.
When was the last time you have truly DARED TO SAY I WANT? Not what my family, my community, my friends, or partner want – but ME – what do I really want? Feels shameful to even say it – right?
“Shame on you” is often the response when we have dared to want openly – to express our desire, our anger, our boundaries, and our love and to act upon them. It is a vicious cycle – the less we express our wants openly and truthfully – the more we pretend and hide – the more ashamed we feel – and the less connected we become. The more we pretend and lie about our basic being to establish a connection – the more isolated we feel – the more we try to solve this with pretense, and the cycle goes on.
Based on this cycle, we have lost touch with how we feel and what we desire. Once we knew this – as it was our whole-body experience – when we were sad our whole being expressed this. But as we were told time and time again – it’s not so scary, it’s not so painful, it’s not so hard, stop being so sad, angry etc.….our experience was invalidated – leading us to doubt ourselves, our feelings and in order to fit in, gain love and acceptance, and avoid fear and pain we gave up on our desires. This cycle resulted in today the numbing sensation and experience of not knowing truly what we want, how we feel, and desire.
But our bodies know exactly what they want – all the time – if we listen they are very clear. I am hungry, I am tired, I am full of energy, I lack oxygen, I hurt, I am angry, I am excited – the body is the primary egoist – because it has no sense of shame! We were born naked – will die the same – and our body is not concerned with how it “should be” – or who to pretend to be for others – to fit, to be right, to hide – our body is happy to be itself.
Shame is a mind trip – expressed upon our body. We form ourselves – and therefore our experience – by how we move, breathe, contract, position ourselves, based on shame. If our bodies are well, and allowed to move, breath, and express itself as it is in each moment – then our need to pretend and hide, and foster shame – stops.
Then the desire and real experience of our being can return, be felt, experienced and in turn practiced and created – and ultimately lived as our daily truth!
Watch our training below to discover more about SHAME.
Releasing shame in the creative process IN SUMMARY
1. Shame is a belief and a feeling which translates into a physical expression and creates the EXPERIENCE of being flawed.
2. Shame is pretending a socially accepted state and hiding or lying about your true state of experience – creating isolation, loneliness, and even more pretense.
3. The body is a healthy egotist because it has no sense of shame!
4. If our bodies are well and allowed to move, breathe and express itself as it is in each moment, then our need to pretend and hide and foster shame stops.
And remember –
You are the Creator – when you embody your creativity – you manifest your dreams!
NOW JOIN US IN THE COLLECTIVE
The place where we talk it out as a community – get involved, share your truth, your struggles, thoughts, and wins!
Answer this questions to yourself and comment your answers below!
1. How are you pretending or hiding what you want? How do you express what you really want in your creativity/ life/ and daily actions?
2. How did focusing your attention on your physical experience allow you to stop shame and get back to what YOU want?
COMMENT AND GET INVOLVED BELOW!
Creative D.R.I.V.E. in ACTION
Weekly implementation to deepen your practice! Simply do yourself a favor and while working with these questions – STAY PHYSICAL!
- With this state of focus, relaxation, attention, movement, and energy ask yourself – what do I want? What do I really, really want?
- Make a list, describe dream and express this. All of it – if you start to censure or feel ashamed, relax, tune into your body and continue.